8 months back:

Pictures taken from Wong Shih Yaw's blog.

I saw these paintings at an exhibition while walking around ION last month. I thought they reflected our society really well.

I smell tuna sandwich in lecture hall.

My stomach can't take this.

Cafes: Artease / Pitchstop / Palette

More food. This is seriously turning into a food blog.

Above food are all found in various parts of NTU.

Friends are always fasinated by how i always have so much money to eat. I also sometimes surprised myself because i honestly do not have a lot of money. After analysing, there is only one conclusion: I dont save. This is a really bad thing. I honestly need learn how to save my money or else im going to be starve sooner or later.

Today is Thursday. Thursday is by far, my favourite school day because i only have one one hour lecture which only starts at 330. Which means i have the whole of the morning and early afternoon to laze around my room... and i am doing exactly that right now. As i am typing this, i am on my bed with my pajamas. Heh. The bad part? I have been doing my readings all morning and my brain is about to burst.

I really enjoy living in a dorm. Maybe i should be more active in hall activities in hope of staying in a hall next year. I have not been a very social person since stepping into uni. I refused to go for any camps or orientations. In fact, i did not even step into NTU once before school started except when i had to move in my clothes and stuff. On the first day of class, i did not know anyone and i was more than ok to stay that way. But two girls came and sat beside me and i realised that one of them was in the same tutorial group as me. That was pure luck. Some people simply cannot find their tutorial mates despite knowing a lot of people. And i am so lucky because i realised my church friend lives two rooms away from me. And everywhere i go, i see people i know from poly. Whoever said that it is hard for poly students to enter uni must have not known many friends back in poly days. The best part is this: i found out that my cousin's friend is also in sociology year 1. I am just amazed how everything fell into place, i suppose.

Ok, gotta get back to my readings. And cook myself some ramen for lunch. You'd better make ramen your best friend if you are a poor student like me.

For you I'd bleed myself dry

I woke up this morning with the song Yellow stuck in my head (Btw, the word in the gif should be look instead of see). Dont you ever wonder how a random song can suddenly pop in your head for no good reason? Or how you can easily play a song in your head while activating your brain cells for other purposes simultaneously?

This song is so beautiful in so many levels, in so many ways. I am glad that i rediscovered it today.

same narrow people, same mindless chatter

Once, i was put into an office filled with phony people. I cant bring myself to be fake like them so i distanced myself. I dont know what hurts more - the fact that they thought i was a social imbecile or the fact that i have to put on a freak show just to fit in.

It is certainly sad to know that the world is so fast paced that it no longer allows time and room for mistakes.

I dont know what kind of lives people are leading. But most of them seem meaningless in my eyes. I hope that i will do something meaningful in the future. Or at the very least, a job that allows me to be... me.

Clarity by Zedd is a good song. Here you go.



I finally changed my tumblr layout. I like it a lot. And my piano exams are tomorrow. I should probably sleep now. Good night.

If picture was a thousand words, then this would be a million words long.

Today was quite a meaningful day. Since the start of holidays, I have been watching many shows. But today, my laptop was lent out to Se Yong and honestly, i simply hate to use Windows now that I have taste the goodness of a MacBook (plus the fact that im lazy to download flash player on iPad) so i had no choice but to not watch any shows. Instead, I downloaded Game Of Thrones and started reading it.

OMGGGG, its really good! Usually most books start to bore me halfway through... or maybe because i havent been reading the right books... but GOT is very well-written. I like the literary style, the plot development and the characters! Since im still at book 1 and the characters and stories are still building up, i do hope that something big is going to happen soon cause right now its just series of events happening to different characters.

Ahh, finally. I have started missing to read books.

And also, i jogged around my estate today. Cue gasping. I think a few months ago, i blogged about wanting to exercise once a week. It never did materialize after the first session HAHAHAHA. But i shall commit from now on!! The inciting incident? Because of my growing tummy ):

I AM SUPER SAD ABOUT IT LEH. I always have high metabolism rate. When i was younger, i looked like a starving african child. And its not that i didnt eat. I ATE. But it wasnt enough so i forced myself to maximise my eating capacity. Which is why i can eat a lot nowadays. BUT! Unfortunately, i read somewhere that as you grow older, your metabolism rate will decrease especially when you hit 25 years old! And i really do think my metabolism rate is dropping!! I mean, im not eating as much as i used to (ok... i take that back since I'm always eating cakes nowadays) but i feel like im getting rounder. Which is fine by me since im still skinny =.= BUT! Imagine... i am so skinny yet i have a tummy. So sad right? So i decided to exercise.

Obviously its not only because of my tummy but also because im trying to lead a healthier lifestyle now. Thanks to Cyril and YongEn who scared the shit out of my about fats and heart attacks and whatnots ages ago. I told them that i have a high metabolism rate so even if i dont exercise, my fats will get burn away. But they told me that trans fat cant be burn away!!!! Damn it. I always eat fries and nuggets. If you know me well enough, in Year 3 Sem 1 i ate 4 nuggets (or more) EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. Because it was the cheapest and yummiest "snack" in FC 6. Then they told me nuggets were the unhealthiest junk food since it made up of different chicken parts that no one would eat. O.M.G. Since then, i have reduced my sugar intake and eating carbonated stuff... by a little. Heh.

So anyway, why did i choose jogging instead of other exercises that specifically targets at slimming down tummy? Er... because im too lazy to find exercises for that. And honestly, jogging is the most simplest form of exercising. You just have to move your legs and just plug in your earphones. And its very efficient! My friend went jogging 4 times a week, 30 mins each session and omg, she slimmed down by half her size. O.O

So yes. Jogging. Since im not trying to slim down, i decided that 30 mins per week should be enough for me. And hence, i went jogging today. By the end of 2 rounds (or roughly 20 mins) I couldnt take it anymore. My feet were burning. WTH. I didnt know feet could burn!! My vision was coloured with a purple tint and everything was too bright. Every muscle in my body ached even though i technically exercised with my leg muscles mainly =.= I cant even stand properly.

This ache lasted a longggg time ok. When i went to bathed, i usually flipped my hair over cause i would slap conditioner all over it and i don't want it to get into contact with my body. And my neck felt like it was going to break. Im not even exaggerating. I dont understand why my neck muscle also can hurt WHEN I DONT EVEN USE MY NECK MUSCLES TO RUN IN THE FIRST PLACE. My stamina and health and lungs must be really in a bad condition. I only ran for 20 mins which is a reasonable time and yet i felt like i was going to die. Srsly have to buck up from now on.

On a side note, Im proud of myself because i ran continuously! Except for the time when i stopped to tie my shoelaces. For me its always mind over matter so i pushed myself all the way even though i wanted to die already. And i do feel that my tummy has deflat!! YES!! THANK GOD THAT I STILL HAVE A HIGH METABOLISM RATE! OFF YOU GO, FATS!

Ok, i have written quite a bit and if you managed to survive that, hats off to you! Shall spam pictures now.

Hahaha, we always ALWAYS do jump shots.

Handsome angmoh guy *o*

Me and my sister. At least our hair resemble each other's

Idk what im doing but look at my thighs. I dont know how my aunt angled to camera that it turned out so creepy D:

I was taking picture all by myself when this angmoh tourist photo bombed me. I looked at him curiously and gave a nervous laugh, hoping that he would go away so i could take another picture. But no. He suggested to take a picture together. Even though i was smiling, you can tell from the picture above that my body language screams "AWKWARD!!!"

He seemed relaxed though =.=

Haha, using the sun to dry our buttocks.

Yup. The end. Good luck to everyone tomorrow seeing we will know our internship locations. SIGH. I hope i wont get some weird/lousy ones.

olympics.

"Well she is certainly happy about performing here"
"Youthful exuberance coming out"

 Omg i love Michelle Jenneke so much! She is so cute and funny and sexy. When i say sexy, i dont just mean her looks and her body. I meant her personality - the "I don't give a damn what you think about me."

 HAHAHA so cute :D

I watched the Badminton Men's Single today and boy was it an amazing match between China and Malaysia. I initially supported Malaysia cause i didnt like how Lin Dan looked (haha judgmental) but 5 minutes into the game, i was cheering for China. Lin Dan is soooo goooooood. The power in his shots and the way he recovers from one stance to another was incredible. Lee Chong Wei played extremely well too and it was hard to tell who would win. When China won, Lee Chong Wei looked so sad ): I think he was crying all the way. But i still think Lin Dan deserved to win anyway because you could tell how much potential he has albeit being careless with his shots.

Good game (Y)

We sleep until the sun goes down

I hate how pretty much every social media website is linked to Google.
I have 3 different accounts and signing in and out every 5 minutes is driving me crazy.

Sigh.

12.03 am now
Don't think I'll be sleeping anytime soon, thanks to CSS.
...

Realisation

It suddenly hit me that we are now in the middle of July.

That's like 7 months since the start of 2012 and another 5 more months to 2013! How did time fly by so quickly? Everything is so surreal right now. 6 more weeks to end of FYP. FYP. The mother of all projects. Just 6 more weeks? How can that even be?

I have been so busy the past few weeks. I haven't watch a TV programme for 2 - 3 weeks. Projects have been lunging at me, devouring my time. But i am excited especially for FYP. It is our blood and sweat and all of us working as a team, seperately. I can't wait till everything comes together.

I shall end here now because there's nothing interesting going on in my life.

Oh, except that I went to USS last Sunday.

But yes, that's about it.

Goodbye.

On a side note, I want to go to a beautiful beach so badly right now ):

I just want to dance in the sun, is that so wrong?

So much things i want to say but cant.
The picture above accurately represents what i am not feeling right now.
Good night.

Oh, and i finally bleached my jeans.

and her head was stuck in the clouds,

dreaming of a world

that she cant have in reality.

A!@#$EH)@{(UIR@(!O

I was on the train with Xiuwen, enjoying the silence between us. (Digression: its kind of weird that we actually have silences with one another since we are both so talkative and outspoken). And you know how trains and bathrooms always have this weird factor to make you ponder about your life? A realisation hit me out of nowhere.

"Do you feel that sometimes you are missing out on life?"

Xiuwen nodded her head. We chatted awhile and then i went back into my state of dwelling. I am not living a normal teenager's life. I dont go out, i dont drink, i dont club, i dont hang out with friends. Everyday, i just go home straight after class. Or else i would be stuck doing projects. Scrolling through my facebook's homepage, i can distinctly see the difference between my life and my friends'.

I am not complaining though. Because i chose this myself. I am very picky when it comes to friends. If a group of friends demand too much of my time, i'd rather pat their heads and bid farewell. Which was what i did to my CCA friends :x I decided that it was too tiring to even try to keep up so i just mysteriously disappeared lol.

I love the comfort of my own home. I like my own solitary. The moment i stepped into my house, i cut off all connections to the outside world. My handphone is thrown aside, neglected, as i bestowed my precious attention on my laptop. I dont sign onto skype and/or msn (its been over 2 years now *proud achievement) and i dont keep my facebook tab open. I dont like when people chat with me online because i want to watch my shows and they just gabber on non-stop. In fact, i just dont like communicating online. I feel like its stripping the essence of face to face talks - but that's another story.

Teenagers like to hang out, like to go clubbing, like to stay out late. But i dont see the joy in that. Ok, actually i like to stay out late but it depends on the company. I love to stay out with my church friends because i only see them once a week and i miss them so much from sunday to friday! But other "normal" teenage stuff i just cant appreciate.

Like drinking. I have never been a fan of drinking. Actually i feel that its a waste of money unless its once in a while kind of thing. Its very obnoxious of me to say this but i feel like i am some "high-class" lady with her nose held high and tsking at every non-constructive activity lol. For the lack of better comparison... a cultured lady (though i am nowhere immersing myself in fine arts) VS an ah lian. Dont know leh, i just find those things meaningless. And meaningless is not the way to live life!!

Err, at least to me.

But there are days when i wonder, am i missing out a teenage's life? Being a teenager is all about finding yourself. How? Through wasting your life and then realising how silly that was; by making all the wrong mistakes and learning from it; just living freely without restraints; doing stupid things and yelling "YOLO".

But i dont like it. I dont want to make the wrong decisions. I dont want to waste my life away. I think all those are stupid. People should be doing more constructive things. Maybe im just growing up too fast. Thats why i said i feel like some conceited tai-tai. I dont feel or act like a normal teenager.

There, arrogant me ):
But i just cant help feeling like that.

Sigh. I really dont know whats the point of this, really. Perhaps its penned up angst from everything. I just feel that there is so much life has to offer but we are just wasting it away. And yes, honestly speaking, i know that i am one of those people. Because i have no freaking idea what life has to offer, thus, dont know what i am wasting.

URGH!!!

Ok, it is safe to conclude that this entire post is written under great amount of frustration plus the fact that my eyes are going to close any minute and is therefore invalid. Good night and good day to all of you.

Updated: gaya just asked if we want to go clubbing on Sunday. I am deliberating. I feel like I should live life a little but i don't really like loud and crowded places. Honestly, I'd rather be alone but... I AM A TEENAGER!!! I SHOULD BE DOING THIS KIND OF STUFF ANYWAY!! What if I'm growing up too fast and just missing out on life?? Choices, choices, choices. Sigh.

Maybe, Maybe

Maybe, everyone is not as strong as they appear to be.
Maybe, everyone is going through the same thing deep down.
Maybe, nobody understands anybody.
Maybe, nobody understands me.
Maybe, somebody understands somebody.
Maybe, somebody understands me.
Maybe, everybody understands everybody.

Is the word "everybody" starting to look weird or is it just me?
 Maybe its just me.

The adventures of Siqi

Have been going out a lot after school recently. I cant remember what i did last week but i know i hung out with my poly friends a lot. This is why i need a blog. My memory is very poor. Cant even remember what i ate yesterday ):

HAHAHA LIES. Cause yesterday we went to (??? forgot the name of the cafe haha) to celebrate Shafeeqah's belated birthday. 

Yum yum! I had chocolate brown cake, Shafeeqah had carrot cake and at the faaaaaar end of the picture is gaya's red velvet.

*inserts cheeguan smile.

The red velvet is certainly good. It was better than One Caramel's.

Still, my favourite cake shop is at Beach Road. Lovely cakes and teas (Y) I forgot the shop's name hahahaha. I even lost their name card. Which btw, why do i always lose name cards ah? But never mind, I can always ask YH to bring me back there lol.

And a very interesting pot of tea. Vanilla Creme Tea. It is sour and i love sour stuff. (Y)

~*~

Today, i went on a mini spontaneous adventure with Reynard and Cyril. I met them up for interviews. Initially, Cyril had driving lessons but it was cancelled. So he decided to explore this abandoned railway tracks near SP cause he is going back there on Sunday to have a photoshoot. 

And somehow, we were all free and were up for an adventure thus the 3 of us began our escapade.

Actually, this part of the tracks were sealed off. There was even a warning sign by the goverment but erm. Nobody actually cares. So we climbed over (Ok, more like go under the hole between the barrier and the tracks.) The railway was abandoned for 20 years already and some of the wooden planks were missing. The metal planks (at the side) looked dubious too. 

Shouldnt have worn a skirt lor! But lucky got FBT so not that bad.

Reynard was scared to climb over the barrier with us so it was only me and Cyril initially. We walked to the middle of the tracks and I sat down on the wooden blocks (picture above!) and there were missing blocks and i could see the field below so i asked Reynard to stand below us. See the weird thing on the bottom right of the picture? My legs HAHAHAHA.

Anyway, we convinced Reynard to join us in the end! We sat down on the middle of the tracks for a while and talked about random stuff. And  i looked very cui ): Lucky its instagram and i am quite photogenic (No, really. Most of the time people say im pretty is when they see pictures/webcam of me. I dont look that nice irl). My pimply face, my dark circles and my messy hair. Speaking of my hair, (*&@!# My fringe has been a bitch for the past week. I want to grow it long but every single time i try, it just refuse to co-operate. Omg, so irritating!!! Am i bound to short fringe for the rest of my life? T_T 

Ok... anyw i wasnt even wearing make up. Thank God i didnt. I was sweating from the mini basketball session prior to climbing the tracks. Not bad leh. Still can shoot after like 7-8 years. LOL.

Cyril has good photography skills. In fact, all these pictures were "koped" from his instagram hahahahaha! So cool right? And yeah, like i said, we stopped in the middle of the tracks because the next half had the river below us. The first half was alright because it was just a field and if we fall, we'll probably sprained ourselves only. But the river...

Fear was apt for this situation.

But i am quite the risk taker/ dare devil. I wanted to go over to the other side. Cyril went first and he said it was safe enough. So i followed after. The gaps between the wooden blocks was quite big so we stepped on the metal planks instead. It was not as safe because when i stepped onto some of the planks, i could feel is sinking slightly D: 

But we made it! See the left side? The whole white thingy is the barrier. We went under the handrail, pivoted ourselves on a slope and grabbed a nearby tree for support before reaching the other side of the sealed off area.

And it was just more tracks lor. Cause its quite long la and the goverment only fenced off the part of the tracks that were high above ground for safety precautions.



We (me and Cyril only cause Reynard was afraid of heights and half of the tracks was all he could courageously bear) found a part of an egg carton on the tracks lol.

And yeah, that was pretty much the end of the journey. When we walked back the railway, it wasnt as scary anymore. Hahaha.

I was quite tired after that. But i think it was worth it. Wasn't there a quote that goes, "A man who dares to waste one hour of time has not discovered the value of life."? Even though i dont like to go under the sun, i think that life should always be spontaneous and interwoven with risks. How else would it be fun? You only live once. It'd be a waste if you're always bound by fear (: