This thing called life

The plans we made, the promises unkept.
Its kind of scary how so many things can change in a year. I used to be afraid and sad over these kind of things but now im just immune.

Changes? Let them come.

I dont believe in getting attached to people. I can honestly say that no one in my life is irreplaceable - with the exception of my family. Friends come and go. Why beg them to stay if their expiration date with you is due? People change; things change. Life is but a journey. There will be people walking out of your life but there are also so many people that you have yet to meet.

Life? Let it be.

A few days ago, i was thinking if i would cry if someone i know dies. The first answer that popped into my mind is no. When my grandfather died, i cried like there is no tomorrow. But now, death to me is nothing. I mean, you're going to heaven. What's so sad about that? Besides, even if you are a lingering soul on Earth, at least you know you wont have to answer your immoral and unethical actions and you wont have any problem or trouble.

I mean, what else can you do other than floating around?

I keep thinking how great would death be recently. I really cant wait till i die. Im not sucidal or depressed or whatever shit la. My life is way too good and i am way too blessed to be thinking of committing suicide. But i really cant wait till i meet Him. So, I am not afraid of death, just afraid of pain. What if i die of cancer? Or some kidnapper stabs me a thousand times? Or what if i drown?

When i die, i dont want people to cry. I want people to be happy for me. Happy that im going to ditch this stupid life and going somewhere else better. Where there are no bad people, no sticky situations, no sadness, no pain. There will only be pleasing music, the King will be on His throne as people dance around his feet. Just pure joy and happiness... and chocolate.

That's how i imagine heaven to be.

Even if there's no heaven, at least i will be rotting away instead of dealing with life, facing stupid people and waiting for death right?

So, till then, i have to continue with my life.
Le sigh.

When life tries to knock all the wind out of you
You've got to roll, roll, roll with the punches
If all life offers is black and blue
You've got to roll, roll, roll with the punches